Habits

You know, it’s been difficult to get in the habit of writing here often. I love to write but I’m not always inspired to do so and part of the point of this blog was to get myself in the habit of writing, even when I’m not in the mood. Not going as well as I had hoped but then, new habits aren’t always easy. Breaking old ones is even harder.

Lately, I’ve been trying to break the habit of negative thinking. I’m not silly enough to think I’ll get to a point where I’ll never have another negative thought but negative thoughts outnumber positive ones and I’d like to change that. I think I’d be happier and less of my hair would fall out. While I’ve been working on this, I’ve noticed how easy it is to fall into the negative thinking of others. It’s so, so easy to let that kind of thinking take you over and I think it makes for a lot of unhappiness. I’ve also noticed how very contagious a smile can be. I’ve waited on customers who seem to be in a somewhat stressed out mood and at the end, I’ve looked them in the eyes and smiled and watched as they realized someone was genuinely smiling at them and so they can’t help but smile also. They leave with that smile still lingering on their lips and their heads held just a little bit higher than when they came in. Smiles are truly contagious. But so are frowns. I don’t want to be one of those people spreading around frowns. So I work at it and work at it. I allow myself to fail and then work even harder. I know one day, I’ll get it down. It’ll be a habit. A good one.

Advertisements

Shut up and drink your Jesus

First off, let me start by saying that anyone who has found this blog by searching for “Jesus” is going to be soooo disappointed. And possibly offended. You may even find yourself wanting to pray for me. Please don’t. While I appreciate that you really feel you’re doing something good, I feel that Jesus has a sense of humor so I’m good here. So if you’re offended by the title and not intrigued, move along. Not the blog for you. I was about to say sorry but I’m really not.

Next, I had a nasty cold recently, which is why there has been so little out of me. I cured it, for the most part, with lots of garlic and vitamin C. I seemed to have let it take a bit of a hold again by having a weekend of fun and alcohol. I had a two-day hangover and today I feel more stuffed up. Or maybe I would have anyway, even without the fun and alcohol. It turns out alcoholic beverages do wonders for making your cold feel like it’s all gone and that’s great. In moderation. Moderation went out the window.

The point of this blog entry, though, is an article I found on coffee this morning. I love articles like these because they support my habit of coffee. They turn it from a “bad habit” into something good. In fact, I may even add one more cup to my daily intake. Maybe. The studies that have been going on, finding correlations between coffee intake and reduced risk of certain diseases is, in my world, the most fantastic things ever. I find these articles more and more lately and there’s nothing better than to be able to say, “See? My addiction is good!” (If it’s good, can it still be called an addiction?) Things I’ve read that coffee can help reduce the risk of: early onset Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s, colon cancer, certain types of skin cancer, breast cancer, type 2 diabetes, and depression. There’s even been a study that seems to have found that coffee can actually help prolong your life. Next they’ll say it can cure death. Coffee will cure disease and raise the dead. Like Jesus. A big, warm, tasty cup of Jesus. Of course, there’s always the chance that coffee will actually be the cause of the Zombie Apocalypse. I hope everyone has their zombie plan ready, just in case.

I just had an entire different paragraph here but I’ve decided to save it for a future blog entry. Don’t want to run out of material. On that note, time to clean up the mess from making coffee. Until next time.

Pardon my mucus

I’ve head a cold since Monday night. I can pinpoint the exact moment it hit me. That weird bit of scratchiness in my throat and a sudden tingling in my sinuses. I sat up straight on the couch and said, “Oh no!” My boyfriend, who was just getting over a cold knew, with just those words. “You’re getting sick!” he said. Yep. That was exactly it. I ran to the kitchen and cut up a bunch of raw garlic and threw it into some left over egg drop soup which I proceeded to garbage down, hoping to get as much garlic in me at once as I could (after heating the soup of course). I also made some tea full of some Chinese herbs that are good for clearing the nose and all that and drank that down. I went to bed.

The next morning, I got up to get ready for an eleven hour shift at work. I didn’t feel much worse but it was definitely taking hold. I got ready, popped a vitamin C drop in my mouth and headed for work. Before I headed in, I stopped and bought some garlic pills. Got to work, made more of my Chinese tea and promptly swallowed two garlic pills. You’re only supposed to take one a day for a healthy heart but I was trying to kill a cold. So two. And I planned on taking another at lunch and then another later in the afternoon. Perfect, because the box says they’re odorless. Lies! All lies! Twenty minutes after taking the first two I could taste garlic in my mouth. (At this point, let me note that the bank I work in is what is known as an in-store branch. An in-store branch is a bank branch located, well, in a store. Usually a grocery store or superstore of some kind. You’ve seen them around. This is as specific as I will get about where I work.) I borrowed some gum from a co-worker and then ran out into the store to buy more gum when I could.

Now, I’m calling the garlic pills a liar but to be fair, I did take two pills as opposed to one, which may very well make a difference. However, later when I just took one, I had that same garlic taste in my mouth twenty minutes later. Granted, that was the third one I’d had that day. So maybe if you just stick to one a day? Regardless, not only was I fighting a cold, I was fighting garlic breath.

I lost the fight. By Tuesday night, the cold was pretty full blown. I went to work Wednesday, which is very busy for us in the evening. That sapped whatever energy I had left and I’m home sick today and glad for the rest. Between the garlic, vitamin C and the Chinese herbal tea (all of which I kept taking throughout Wednesday) I think I managed to lessen the impact though. I don’t think I’m as sick as my boyfriend got and I think, with rest today, that I should be feeling quite a bit better tomorrow. Which is good, because the boyfriend and I are heading up to his old college’s homecoming celebrations Saturday and meeting up with friends there. Some I know, but others I don’t and I don’t want my first impression to be of someone completely high on cold medicine, although that may have to be how it is. At least it’ll be amusing.

Yep, I’m going to talk about it

Are you ready? Because I’m SO going to talk about it. That’s right. The iPhone 5. I don’t have one. I will. I plan to replace my iPhone 4 when my phone is up for an upgrade because I refuse to pay $750 for a new phone. I’ll pay $300 though. Why? Because Steve Jobs did a very good job of brainwashing me so, of course, I must have this new toy. And yes, I realize he died almost a year ago but it’s not like in the movies when you kill the Head Vampire all the lesser vampires revert back to being human (I’m thinking of The Lost Boys here. You know, actual badass vampires). Just because Mr. Jobs is no longer among us doesn’t mean his brainwashing has gone away. That’s here to stay unless his replacements really, really fuck it all up. So far, this doesn’t sound like the greatest upgrade but they haven’t screwed it up to the point where my brain is able to override the desire to have it anyway.

I have a taste of the new phone with the software upgrade on my current phone. iOS 6 seems to be a clusterfuck, really. And Apple’s anti-Google bigotry really stands out now. The You Tube app that came standard with the phone disappeared. It can be downloaded for free now but really? And no more Google maps! It’s Apple maps, which is a comedy of errors. Really, I don’t know what the issue they have with Google is but I’m pretty sure that Google will one day become self-aware and will then become our benevolent overlord so really, Apple, have some respect.

I also had to download a new app just to be able to read my work schedule which is done as an Excel spreadsheet. Used to be I could just go into my email, open the attachment and there it was. No more. A couple extra steps are needed now and scrolling from one part of the schedule to another results in a bunch of choppy jumping so that you end up overshooting where you wanted to go. Some people have had an issue with using WiFi. The new Passbook thing doesn’t work for a lot of people. The whole thing is just buggy as hell and I feel sad because I’m pretty sure Steve Jobs would never have allowed a product like this to be released. He would have demanded better because he was a flippin’ tyrant and that’s how he rolled. Tim Cook is totally dropping the ball here.

And what’s with the new USB connector? I’m sure there are design reasons for making it smaller (maybe for a little more battery room?) but that’s not the issue I have. They named it. They named the connector. It’s called Lightning. Who the hell names a USB connector? There were so many other things that could have used a little extra attention while they were sitting around coming up with a name for a USB connector!

So WHY am I still determined to have this new phone? Because I still hold out hope that this will be a big lesson to Tim Cook and that these kinds of colossal mistakes won’t happen again. Because I’m hoping there will be an update to fix the bugs (maybe even before my upgrade comes up next month). Because my phone doesn’t have Siri and as slow as she can be, I still want her on my phone (and because I hear the update actually has her working better for the most part – something that went right). I look forward to a bigger screen and a thinner phone (Although now its just going to stick out of my jeans pockets even more – is there a reason the pockets on women’s’ jeans are so much shallower than men’s? We put things in our pockets too!) *shrug* I happen to be a sheep in this case, I admit it. But at least I wasn’t standing outside the Apple store on September 22nd waiting to drop $750 on a phone that is only kinda better than the one before, which was only slightly better than the one before that. Steve, you did your job well.

I was right about the asshole

Yesterday I received half the number of views I did on my most viewed day. That makes sense as I satisfied half the requirements. I can’t wait to try out my theory on the weekend. So for future reference, the word “asshole” is an attention grabber people. This weekend I may try a different cuss word just for shits and giggles. See what I did there? Yeah, neither do I. I don’t intend on my blog being filled with cussing from now on, I just find this an interesting experiment. Maybe I should always include a swear word in my tags. Or maybe I’ll just beg and plead with you all to spread this blog around! It’s fun here. Borderline crazy. And there will be posts that are just full of crazy I’m sure. So spread it! Spread the crazy! Because then people will smile or laugh and then they’ll be happy and happy people will save the world. So really, you’re just helping to save the world by sharing my blog. Who knew it would be that easy?

Apparently the word “asshole” gets views (or What I’ve Learned So Far)

So far in my very short blogging “career” I’ve learned a couple of things. 1. I should save my best stuff for the weekends. 2. Cussing in the title brings readers. Perhaps these are the wrong lessons but my most viewed post had the word “asshole” in the title and I put it up on a weekend. I have no objection to this as I can swear like a drunken sailor when I feel like. I apologize if that last sentence is now considered insensitive to sailors. You never know now-a-days. I’ll have to look into that. Or not. I’ll probably just keep using that simile on the rare occasion I need it.

I had to ask my boyfriend if “swear like a drunken sailor” was an analogy, a metaphor or what. At first he said it was a smilie, which, I agreed, but he had meant simile. He did correct himself but I liked his first assessment. I think that’s how I’ll go about my day today. Everything will be smilie. Man, the automatic spell check is having a fit with that one. Fuck you spell check. I’ll spell how I want!

What this all means is that I’d better come up with some good stuff for this weekend. I’m sure I can pull out something. I’ve got all sorts of work stories (I work at a bank – won’t say which one as I’d like to keep my job). Something hilarious is bound to happen between now and the weekend as well. I can’t wait. I’ve got my little blog notebook at the ready to write some event down so I don’t forget it. Bring it on!

Coffee talk

I’ve been neglecting my blog. I apologize. I’ve been having some personal things going on. This isn’t where I’m going to air my dirty laundry so I won’t go into details. Suffice it to say, writing has not been a priority, which is terrible, really. This makes me happy and I really should try and do it each and every day! Even when I don’t feel like it, or I’m uninspired. I just hate to put something out there that’s just SUCH a bad read! Practice makes perfect though.

Had trouble with my coffee this morning. I have this one cup brewer thing. I call it a “lazy man’s french press” because you don’t even have to press anything. It’s called a Clever Coffee Dripper. It’s a very simple thing and you wouldn’t think it would make a good cup of coffee but, oh, it does. And it’s so easy. (It’s here if you’re curious). You may have to play with how much coffee you add at first but that’s something I do with any new coffee maker, directions be damned. Different coffees require different amounts. The directions on the coffee usually need to be tweaked a bit. The directions are just a starting off point in my humble opinion. But then, I like my coffee more than most. Drinking coffee is an entire experience for me, from the brewing to the drinking. Well, sometimes a cafe brews it for me but the drinking part…that’s the best. Coffee must be savored. Every sip should be concentrated on and enjoyed to its fullest.

You see, I’m a coffee addict. If I could, I’d drink it all day. It makes me exceedingly happy and clears my head, allowing me to concentrate. It’s been suggested I’m mildly ADD because of that. I do spend most of my time feeling a little foggy and unfocused, so possibly. All I know is I like a good, strong cup of coffee. Must have some sort of sweetener in it though. And I recently learned I can take or leave any kind of cream, as long as the coffee is good coffee. Good coffee is smooth, no matter how strong it is. My current fave is a dark roast by Starbucks called Cafe Verona. It’s roasty with almost chocolate undertones. Delicious.

I completely got off topic (ADD?). I was talking about the trouble I had making coffee this morning. Sometimes I’m so in need of coffee that I have issues making it. Or ordering it, if I’m in a cafe. This morning, I boiled up some water, poured it in the dripper to let the coffee steep and then poured some hot water into my mug to prepare the mug, so to speak. It heats up the mug and helps the coffee stay hotter longer. When the coffee is ready, you dump the water out of the mug and then the coffee goes in. Forgot to dump the water, so ended up with watered down coffee everywhere when the mug overflowed. *sigh* So I cleaned everything up, dumped the used grounds in the kitchen composter, boiled some more water and went to pour it in the dripper only to realize I hadn’t put the filter back in and added coffee. At least that didn’t require starting all over but it delayed me a minute. I skipped the prepping the mug thing as I’m fairly certain the inside was still warm (plus I was afraid I’d make the same mistake AGAIN). After about four minutes of steeping, I finally had my coffee. Worth every fumbling moment but some days it’s so difficult to get that cup.

There was a time I wandered into my usual coffee shop (Ok, it’s a Starbucks) to order a coffee and all I could come up with at first was, “I’ll take a grande…something. Oh my gods, I need coffee so bad I can’t order my coffee!” Cue laughing baristas. Luckily, I go there enough that they accurately guessed what I wanted. It didn’t keep the one guy from writing “Something” with a big smiley face on the side of my cup. I love that place. Although, honestly, the small, non-chain cafes are usually a bit better and I prefer to support a small business, I just haven’t found one on the way to work. There are at least three Starbucks, though, and they make a good latte, support equal rights and, from what I hear, are really good to all of their employees. I’ve never run across an unhappy person working at Starbucks. Of course, they’re probably all hopped up on espresso. I’d be happy all the time too. I once considered working at a Starbucks but it occurred to me I’d never sleep again and really, I value sleep.

Last thing, for anyone who has read any previous posts, my dog, Pandora, is doing just fine. She came out of the vets office with some funny shaved patches, some pain killers and some liquid antibiotics. Later that evening you’d never know anything had happened to her (except the funny haircut). I wish I were that resilient. Time for her walk. Looks like the sky may open up and drop some rain so I’d better hurry.

I’m here!

No, haven’t forgotten my blog. It’s just been a week and I have a work schedule that isn’t consistent. It makes it slightly more difficult to manage my time. I prefer routine but…sometimes we don’t get what we want. I’ll figure it out. In the meantime, watch this space! Or the space above it. Because I won’t actually be writing more in this space once I publish it.

Damn feral cat

This morning, I let my dog out as usual. I have a five pound Chihuahua named Pandora. She’s adorable.

Pandora

You seriously can’t get more adorable than this. I’ve tried.

Anywho…she ran out into the back yard, spotted something in the bushes near the back fence and went to investigate. There was silence for a few seconds and then suddenly, my dog comes flying out, screaming, with a black and white cat on her heels. I’ve seen this cat before. She usually runs when she sees Pandora. Not this time. At this point, my instincts kick in and I go running at the cat. I think my teeth were actually bared and I know my hands were ready to claw at the thing if I got hold of it. And it’s a good thing I didn’t because all my brain was thinking was “DESTROY!” I responded like a mother seeing one of her children being threatened and I think I would have killed it before I realized what I was doing. Sometimes the primitive part of the brain is scary. But I digress. As usual. So the cat gets away from me, I comfort my dog, hover protectively while she relieves herself and then take her inside to clean her up and check for wounds. She was favoring her right front leg and I found what seemed to be a puncture wound there. Cleaned it with disinfectant, wrapped it in gauze so she wouldn’t lick at it and keep a scab from forming (best protection from infection) and now she’s laying in my lap, still shaking from time to time. Poor thing.

After, I IMed my boyfriend at work to tell him about it. He mentioned that he saw tiny, tiny kittens in the backyard this morning. We concluded that they are probably the cat’s and she was defending her kittens, which would explain why she didn’t run off as usual. People – if you insist on letting your cats run free, for the love of ALL gods, get them FIXED. Please. There are now a bunch of kittens, born out of doors, who, if they make it to adulthood without getting sick or picked off by predators, will be completely feral and make more kittens and more kittens…you get my meaning. I’m going to go out there later and see if there’s a little nest of cats in the bushes. If so, the Humane Society is getting a call. That situation ends here. Sorry to go all Bob Barker on you folks.

The whole point of this story (aside from venting) is to get to the rest of the conversation  my boyfriend and I had on IM. It was hilarious and I had to share.

Me: Ok, well, I may have to go out there and see what’s up. We can’t have a nest of kittens in the back yard.

Boyfriend: Indeed. I wonder what would scare her away?

Me: Well, calling animal control or the Humane Society should take care of it if they’re living back there.

Boyfriend: Maybe some tiger blood or panther urine.

Me: I’ll call Charlie Sheen

Boyfriend: I’m sure Petco has some.

Me: He’s got Tiger blood, right? Oh yeah. Petco has shelves of panther urine

Boyfriend: I think that might be metaphorical tiger blood. Don’t get the cheap panther urine, it doesn’t work for shit

Me: Right. Pricey panther urine only.

Honestly, I think I’d go crazy if my life wasn’t filled with conversations like that. Laughter makes everything better. đŸ™‚
UPDATE: Found another, worse, puncture wound on her chest/armpit area. I wasn’t comfortable letting that one go so we ended up at the vet who found even more wounds! She’s all cleaned up now though and is full of antibiotics and pain killers and sleeping soundly. That was seriously a hell of a morning.

You people are weird

I was rummaging through my stats for my blog, as a new blogger tends to do – actually, I’m guessing a not-so-new blogger likes to look at that as well, but I digress. There’s a section that will show you what search terms people used in a search engine that led them to your blog. Here’s what I found:

Ha!

You people are weird.

I remember that post, and how I was commenting that a search for Mitt Romney’s crotch brings up nothing. Well now, my friends, it does apparently. My blog. I couldn’t be more proud. It would appear if you’re looking for a dominatrix in Portsmouth that you’ll get to my blog as well. I’m on my way to something big here, folks.